6/27/2008
BREAKING NEWS... JUNE 27 08 
(LF)

Wednesday, June 26
PROVINCETOWN MASS:

Sanitation workers discovered the headless body of a man in a construction dumpster on Commercial Street early this morning. An I.D. card from the Milton School for the Developmentally Challenged identified the deceased as John Black, a writer for the Cape Cod Times.



Said Detective Patrick Gillin, "Although we haven't located the head as yet, the fact that the cadaver's body weight is the same as noted in all recent medical records indicates that the head may be shoved up inside one of the larger body cavities."

Results of the coroner's autopsy should be available later today. So far, there are no suspects.

2/12/2008
2/12/08 
Louis (once again doing some sort of secretarial-type work for DF) has sent in another quote:

DF, Overheard in on a cell phone:

"Freddie called me from some dump downtown where he was having dinner with the whole rhythm section. Can you believe this guy Clay Aiken hired them to record as a unit? I mean, shouldn't they have to ask our permission before they go off and do this sort of high-profile mainstream moonlighting? ... Exotic, my foot! Doesn't it have something to do with television?"

See ya later,
L.

1/29/2008
1/29/08 
Here' a quote from DF, overheard in conversation 1/27/08:

" Incidentally - at this point, don't you think Obama should be wearing an armored suit and helmet at all his public appearances? I don't mean to be paranoid - I'm only mentioning it because of what happened to other nationally important black or left-liberal types the other... 12 or 13 times before..."

1/14/2008
1/14/08 
hey fanattics,
--- just talked to my brother who is convinced that, if you close your eyes, Barack Obama sounds exactly like Richard Boone, the actor who played Paladin on HAVE GUN WILL TRAVEL. I'm too young to have seen the show, but I once saw him in this totally bizarre no-budget film where he plays a guy who takes a job as the executive in charge of a cemetary. He was great. In the office, Richard Boone has this big map of all the plots in the graveyard. Every time he sticks a pin in the map to indicate where someone will be buried, THEY DIE THAT NIGHT! ----------- MMWAH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA ha ha ha ha ha ha haaaaaah!

Anyhow, my brother emailed the photo below, i guess by way of hilarious collegiate-type humor...

3/20/2007
3/18/07 
My shrink says it would be self-liberating to occasionally post one of these heinous, cringe-a-delic communications from my Noids. So here goes:

Alexis darling,

We're so excited that Steely Dan is playing in Lucca at the same time we're going to be in Pisa. You know that your father has never seen them ever! Are you going to be there?

Lewis will be traveling with us! He's back home again. We even cleared out his old room so maybe he'll be so comfortable, he'll stay for a while.

It will be wonderful to have him in Italy because it's like having a tour guide - he knows the names of the Dukes and the Popes, and who murdered who and who slept with who and so on. Also the painters and the best museums and restaurants.

We're driving home from Florida on Friday. Be well darling,

Mom